This isn’t going to be the most shocking thing you read all morning, but Jon Gosselin is now making the talk show circuit playing the victim. He told Good Morning America’s Chris Cuomo that he “doesn’t trust” Kate and can’t even sit next to her on the same couch anymore.

“I despise [her] because she’s not speaking from the heart…Please — the stuff you tell me in private should be the stuff you tell me on TV,” he said.

He thinks she had an affair with the bodyguard, stole his wedding ring, and wants to sour his good name (HA!) by appearing on magazine covers under garish headlines bashing him.

Oh, and he says 22-year-old Hailey Glassman is his “soul mate.”

We are thrilled he’s found love. Can we now please move on? Please?

Let’s chalk up the Gosselins as nothing more than a dysfunctional summer fling that can end once Labor Day passes. Let’s shelve them like we do our white sandals.

Do we really want to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas with more Gosselin drama?

The short answer: NO. The long answer: HELL NO.

Oh man. Halloween 2009 will look a lot like the checkout line of your local supermarket — rows and rows of Kate Gosselin’s everywhere.

The official Kate Gosselin “sleek and so stylish” head piece is expected to a a big Halloween party staple. The “Eight Is Too Much” wig is on sale at buycostumes.com for $14.99.

Better stock up while supplies last!

Kate Gosselin picks up the pieces, and the coffee, as she runs errands at Starbucks, UPS Store, PETCO and Toys R Us yesterday with twins Mady and Cara.

Meanwhile, back at the bachelor pad, Jon and girlfriend Hailey Glassman enjoy a walk in New York’s Harriman State Park.

Jon & Kate Gosselin family – remember them?  When we last heard from the troubled reality couple, they were announcing plans for a divorce.  It appears they were able to put their drama aside for the July 4th holiday and enjoy time together with the kids.

Another setback for Kate Gosselin.

Her new clothing line promotion deal with Healthex is up in the air.

“Our project is on hold while she focuses on her family,” said a rep.

The fall clothing line is still available at Wal-Mart, but Gosselin is not involved.

Jon and Kate Gosselin are speaking out about their pending divorce:

“During this very difficult time we will be working to focus solely on the needs of our family. This includes no longer commenting publicly or reacting to media stories and speculation,” the Gosselins said — in a public statement released on the Web site of TLC, which airs Jon & Kate Plus 8.

“Our goal is to do the very best for our children and that will be done as privately as possible. We appreciate the understanding, support and well wishes from so many.”